BICENTENNIAL TRIBUTE
Amusing Poetical Anecdotes for Brief Byronic Theatricals
by Jed Pumblechook
LORD BYRON


From Stationer’s Hall to Grocer’s Stall:
Murray Endeavours to Navigate his Lordship's Reading
4
Cast
Lord Byron
Fletcher
John Murray
Richard Hoppner
Cavalier Mendalgo
James Perry
4
Scene 1
Albemarle Street, 1818
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P: Howd'ye do Murray
M: Perry -
To hook the reader, you, John Murray, Have publish’d “Anjou”’s Margaret, Which won’t be sold off in a hurry (At least, it has not been as yet); And then, still further to bewilder ’em, Without remorse, you set up “Ilderim”; So mind you don’t get into debt, Because, as how, if you should fail, These books would he but baddish bail. And mind you do not let escape These rhymes to Morning Post or Perry, Which would be very treacherous – very – And get me into such a scrape. For, firstly, I should have to sally, All in my little boat, against a Galley – And, should I chance to slay the Assyrian wight, Have next to combat with the female knight. And pricked to death expire upon her needle, A sort of end which I should take indeed ill!
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Pooh! pooh! I look’d at Wordsworth’s milk-white “Rylstone Doe” –44 Hillo!45 I read “Glenarvon” too by Caro Lamb –46 God damn!
I read the “Christabel”;39 Very well – I read the “Missionary” –40 Pretty – very – I tried at “Ilderim” –41 Ahem! I read a sheet of “Marg’ret of Anjou” –42 Can you? I turned a page of Webster’s “Waterloo